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James 1:19-21 Review: ◙ Matthew 5-7: In one of Jesus’ most recognized teachings, he identifies anger as the trigger for all types of disorder in our lives; and, he speaks about it in the context of “kingdoms”- in my kingdom, everyone does what I want; everything goes the way I want it So, anger is the basic human response when life doesn’t go our way! Our will has been instructed, our rights have been violated; we resist and seek to eliminate the obstruction. ◙ James also indicates, in no uncertain terms, that it is an expectation of Christianity (your identification with Jesus) that you allow God to transform this aspect of your life. Grace, by definition, implies change. Grace is not only described as God’s movement toward us, but God’s interaction in and with us. It removes our most important behavioral “trump card”… “That’s just the way I am”. ◙ James suggests that challenging life-circumstances always seems to make us “quick to speak, unwilling to listen and ticked off!” James 1:20 “… man’s anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires”. There’s something about our angry responses which prevents us from living the kind of life that God desires for us. * Typically, we find that people process anger in (1) of (3) identifiable ways: 1) “Toxic Dump” - You’d never know from the manicured surface (your compliant and pleasant demeanor) that underneath, there are toxins slowly decaying from the inside-out. - You were probably taught that anger was evil and that you should never let your emotions show. - You can’t “speak truthfully” about your anger, because you can’t be honest about your feelings. - the result? high blood pressure, ulcers, depression, headaches… but, with a smile! 2) “Pillow Fighter” - You want to fight, but you feel that since the blows are softened, no one will get hurt. - You disguise your anger as humor; your response of choice: sighs, disappointed looks, and sarcasm. - You have made “mumbling” an art form; “nothing” is your word of choice (“What did you say?”). * Sarcasm only exacerbates angry situations, because we realize there’s always an underlying message; sentiments not being spoken (“What’s that supposed to mean?”) 3) “Detonator” - The polar opposite of the “Toxic Dump”. You’re convinced that it’s best to just “let it out”; suppressing all those feelings his harmful, so it’s just best to “let people know where you stand!” - While it may be cathartic and therapeutic for you, it leaves a trail of human wreckage behind in its wake. * Our homes are such a cultural training ground. Many of the responses we manifest are indicative of the way that we saw anger managed within our own home (i.e. yelling, throwing, hitting, quiet disapproval, etc.) * In the New Testament, there are (2) words used for “anger”: 1) a more sudden response; quickly manifests itself, then quickly subsides. 2) a more settled, abiding condition; less sudden, but more lingering. This is the one most associated with “bitterness”. “It seems fairly simple to determine if I am angry, but how can I know if I am bitter?” Ask yourself… 1. “Do you find that the offender frequents your thought-life?” 2. “Is the offender the topic of conversation more than occasionally?” 3. “Do you often fantasize about what it will be like when you get the opportunity to even the score?” 4. “When you see them coming down aisle 4, do you quickly divert your cart toward aisle 5?” * Here’s the real irony with bitterness: nobody ever wants to be around the people who have antagonized them; we avoid them, but when we are bitter… they’re everywhere we go! (home, work, gym, school, mall, bed, bathtub!) * In the O.T., bitterness was associated with misery and bondage. People who are bitter are actually imprisoned by their own anger. Reflections… ►There’s no such thing as “getting even”. There is no taste as bitter as the sweet taste of revenge! We always inflict a little more punishment than may be necessary to ensure that the message is received! * People who study human emotional patterns and propensities tell us that “depression” is one of the primary manifestations of bitterness. If you think about it, the definition of depression is ‘an area that is sunk below its surroundings’ (and we think we are getting even!) What if there’s a better way? What if there was a better way than an eye for an eye? At some point in the development of our relationships, there has to be something better than “Don’t kill each other”. There has to be a better course of action; one that’s sufficient to address the root cause of the anger; a way that not only doesn’t harm the offending party, but actually desires and actively seeks their wholeness. “You’ve heard it said… but, I tell you…” Jesus ►Retaliation is something you do to inflict harm on others; bitterness is self-inflicted (you do it to yourself!) Bitterness is not about getting angry, it’s about choosing to stay angry. Bitterness is about sustaining mental lists and requires constant attention and energy to keep anger alive. ►It doesn’t have to be inflicted to cause injury. It can be a look, or a tone, or worse… no words at all! “Slow to speak” because… Proverbs 12:18 “Some people make cutting remarks, but the words of the wise bring healing”. Proverbs 18:21 “The tongue can bring death or life…” ►Refuse to believe that anger can ever be used to your advantage. Many people feel that they can “use” anger to motivate them in life; that if they have been abused or neglected or wronged, they can channel that rage and allow it to energize them. While it may fuel your pursuits, the energy it requires to sustain it will subtly erode your soul and eat away at every one of your relationships. You may prove successful, but you’re still not free! Ephesians 4:26-27 “And don’t let anger control you. Don’t let the sun go down while you are still angry, for anger gives a foothold to the devil”. Instead of affording opportunity to you, it creates opportunity for the devil; it gives him space; it makes room for him in your life and relationships. * When dealing with harmful, inappropriate responses (man’s anger), the biblical admonition is always to “get rid of it”. Ephesians 4:31 “Get rid of all bitterness, rage, and anger…” Colossians 3:8 “But now you must rid yourselves of all such things as these: anger, rage, malice and slander…” James 1:21 (in context of “man’s anger does not produce…”) “Therefore, get rid of all moral filth and the evil that is so prevalent…” 1Timothy 2:8 “In every place of worship, I want men to pray with holy hands lifted up to God, free from anger and controversy”. ►If you hold onto it long enough, it will take root. Hebrews 12:15 “See to it that no one misses the grace of God and that no bitter (lit. ‘poison’) root grows up to cause trouble and defile many”. Ephesians 3:17 “…rooted in love”
* Currently, our lives are being supplied by
either love, or bitterness. You can be certain that your life will manifest
(produce) only what can come from the source. |
